Year in Country!!

It has been over a month since my last blog entry, but not due to lack of things to write by any means. Last Thursday, August 12, was my anniversary of arriving in Guatemala. I feel like I want to say that the time has flown by and it feels like I just left, but to be honest that really isn’t true at all. The past year has been filled with so much discovery, confusion, happiness, sadness, loneliness, and enjoyment of the company and sharing with new friends, all at the same time. Which is probably why Peace Corps is also known not only as “the toughest job you’ll ever love” but also a 27-month emotional roller coaster. A year ago, I arrived in a country that I knew only by newspaper, film, guidebooks, and stories. And now, it feels like home (kind of). There are certain times where I feel like I have enveloped so much of what is Guatemala, and other times when I feel that there are certain things I will just never be able to accept or understand. But I have undoubtedly learned a lot. I now know how to board a bus even while it is still in motion, and then argue with the bus ayudante who collects the fare when I know he is trying to rip me off, and then bang on the wall of the bus when I am ready to get off. I understand that unless you have a personal relationship with someone, no matter what your title is or how educated you are, they won’t want to work with you unless you have “confianza”. I no longer cringe (as much) when I see the de-headed chickens and tubs of chicken feet in the markets. The list goes on and on..

But even though there are some times that I find myself very homesick or wondering what I am really doing here, I know that the journey is far from over (15 months to be exact) and that I still have a lot to learn and accomplish. Another Muni PCV a year ahead of me told me that the first year is “figuring it out” which now I can totally understand to be true. I arrived here, thinking I spoke excellent Spanish, thinking that I already knew about development work, thinking many things that in the end turned out to completely not be true. Just because I could speak Spanish well didn’t necessarily mean that I could effectively communicate certain things to Guatemalans in a way that they were able or willing to understand. And just because I had a couple years of work in development didn’t mean that I was prepared for confronting a strong machista culture and completely corrupt and inefficient local government.

But in any case, my Guatemalan friends congratulated me on my first year and expressed their happiness that I would still be here for a little over a year more. Which made me feel really good. One thing that is really easy to do here is focus on the negative: the machismo, the unprofessional work environment, the noise, the pollution, the leaky walls during rainy season, the snail’s pace manner in getting work done, the people who don’t show up to meetings, the repetitive beans/eggs/tortillas, the extreme poverty.

But there are also many positives of which sometimes I have to remind myself on the days when I am sad or annoyed. Like the beautiful mountains where I live, the people who warmly embrace my presence, the relaxed pace of life, the 10:00 snack break, the ability to buy fresh fruit and vegetables every single day, the support and company of other PCVs who deal with the exact same frustrations that I do.

One really interesting cultural difference between the US and Guatemala is the collectivism. In the US, I feel that people take the attitude of wanting to have “their own” of everything: their own personal space, their own food, their own house, their own belongings. Here in Guate, it is the total opposite. You can see someone board the bus and sit right down next to another passenger, even though the bus could be practically empty. Snacks and food are meant to be shared, no matter how small or messy the portion. One recent example is when I had some friends over and one of the women brought her baby. The baby was crying and fussy as we were eating. I was holding him for a moment during this crying, when my friend stuck her fingers right into my plate of coconut sticky rice to try and offer some to the baby. Turns out he wasn’t hungry, since he didn’t accept the rice, but in that moment, I kind of lost my appetite as well. If this had happened back in the states, I probably would have proclaimed, “What are you doing?! Get your hands out of my food!” but here, she would have likely thought I was either crazy or extremely rude for even suggesting that what she did was gross.

Running is something that has definitely kept me busy lately. While it can be stressful at times, it has also been a good way to help my integration (plus the tortilla and arroz con leche spare tire which I have acquired since arriving here). A few weeks ago I ran a half marathon in Antigua, in preparation for a race that I did on August 8th called the “Ascenso a los Cuchumatanes”. It was the physically and mentally hardest race I’ve ever done. A fellow runner friend here in town had told me about it, and when he first described it to me, I thought he was kidding. The race started in Huehuetenango city, passed through my town of Chiantla, and climbed the mountain until reaching a point at the top called El Mirador. Huehue city lies at 6,500 feet and the Mirador at 11,000 feet. It was a complete half marathon of 21 KM/13.1 miles (although prior to the race, when asking people about the distance, I heard answers between 17 and 23 kms. Go figure). When I finally reached the top, after having what felt like a civil war between my brain and my body, I was greeted by some of the women in my literacy class and fellow PCVs who ran. The altitude hit me right away and I felt a strong tingling in my head, even in my nose and eyes, which I had never felt before. But after some watery hot chocolate and some deep breathing with my head between my knees, I felt incredible satisfaction along with the lightheadedness. And although it was very challenging, it made me feel so good that so many people came out to support and cheer me on during the race. And ever since, I’ve had people stop me on the street and in the market and say, “you’re the gringa who ran the Ascenso!” So it was a pretty cool accomplishment. Especially since there were only 32 women who ran out of 800 people, so you can bet I’ll be participating in this annual race again next year!

My passion for running also inspired me to organize a local race in my town. The youth development NGO where I volunteer and teach English to the employees is falling on some hard economic times. So, in a meeting where we discussed moneymaking strategies, I presented the idea of coordinating a race to benefit the association. They all liked the idea, so I promptly put everyone to work and began planning logistics and promotion. The race will take place in two weeks and is called “Corriendo por la Juventud”, or Running for Youth. I wanted the race to have less focus on winning and more focus on achieving, so we are going to give a diploma to every participant. We are soliciting different businesses to give us water, prizes, etc. and I am trying to remain calm that things will come together; that people will actually show up to run, that we will have enough water, that it won’t end up a disaster.

While I do feel that I am accomplishing more things at work, certain obstacles have become more outstanding in recent weeks. Our mayor, who barely supports our work, has proclaimed that the municipality is completely broke and now there is no gas money for us to go into communities and train women’s groups. Going out into the villages and meeting the women’s groups is one of my favorite parts of my job, so it is a real bummer that we have to cancel all trainings until further notice. And two of the three women who work in my office have not been so nice to me ever since I arrived here, and it is really starting to take a toll on me. The situation is that they are basically very trivial, jealous people who are only in these jobs as political favors. So it definitely makes for a difficult work environment but I have recently resolved to try as hard as possible to not let their pettiness bother me, and if necessary, I will find a new place to work. I definitely don’t want to have to resort to that last option, but I am also unwilling to let myself be unhappy on account of two difficult people.

Friends and family back home often ask what I’d like to receive in care packages. The answer used to be “I am fine don’t send me anything” but I changed my mind :) Chocolate of any sort and Annie’s Naturals Mac and Cheese are more than welcome anytime! And, I have recently created this wall of cards and letters that people have sent me, and I love mail!

Thanks to everyone who has supported me during the last year. It is one of the things that helps me along this journey and I appreciate knowing I can count on so much family and friends for the next year and three months to come!

My mail-from-home wall. Keep those cards and letters coming! :)

With some other Huehue PCVs after finishing the Ascenso a los Cuchumatanes race
We started the race in that city wayyy down there
With more PCVs in the Antigua half marathon
Celebrating "Día del Empleado Municipal" (Municipal Employee Day). The muni sponsored a day of soccer and drinking at these pools and gave us three days off. Gotta love the made-up holidays..
Some training runs in my town. Is it not beautiful!? Visit me and I'll take you running here :)

PCV ladies from my training group after having a "girls night" at my house. I am lucky to have a great support network of other volunteers!

And more PCVs at David's surprise party at La Mansion del Taco in Huehue